Wherein I replace one abstruse metaphor with another

From BikeSnobNYC
If one were sitting on the toilet while perusing the artwork of Mike Giant only to find oneself out of toilet paper, one would not sit there shouting helplessly until a friend came to one’s aid with a roll of arcal and a 3wrencho; instead, one would simply do the logical thing and clean [...]

More dodecaphonic goodness

Hot on the heels of the Raisin Brahms ad comes this informercial for the toe-tapping triskadekaphobic tunes of the second Viennese school.

Black and Blue

The Wife and I journeyed to West Lafayette last night to see the comedian Lewis Black at Elliott Hall, a massive, 6,000-seat proscenium theatre. He was as good as you would think he would be, which is to say, very good. Having come up by touring the college ranks, his local humor (about Purdue, Boilermakers, [...]

Sign of the times

Line from the kids’ school about afterschool programs:
Sewing will happen, but will not begin until late October, after the volleyball season is over.

Breaking radio silence

Sports Bureau:

Much like the two New York football teams actually play in New Jersey, the Chicago Bears QB situation is all about Indiana. For now West Lafayette (home of Purdue, Kyle “Neck Beard Ninja” Orton’s alma mater) has beaten out Bloomington (home of Bloomington South HS, Rex “Sex Cannon” Grossman’s alma mater. I can now officially wear [...]

You’ve got to be carefully taught

It’s hellish to have a chest cold, one of those colds during which you can’t catch your breath when you cough. But this was totally worth it. A month or so ago I gave Daughter #1 one of my cotton handkerchiefs, so that she wouldn’t fill the back of my car with biodegradable waste as she went through [...]

Killing chihuahuas

Well, duh. The less you post, Hugh, the fewer times that people (even those who read the blog regularly) will come and visit. And your stats will go down. And you’ll get colds more often. And every day you don’t post, another two or three (almost-)endangered polar bears will fall lifeless into the melting arctic [...]